ellensagh

6. Open Leavings

Living my Life Song

Releasing the Past

I Am Done!

And yet aspects from before

Still useful

Find new uses for old and pass it on

Holding on to what

For what purpose?

August 16, 2020

Leavings –The following are Writings (August 9 – October 17, 2020; inspired by Book: The Woman’s Spell Breaker: A journal for rediscovering your true nature by Cindy Johnston; shared with my daughter) interspersed with my daily snippets.

One of My Tribe; a woman from Alberta; who I’m unsure I ever met; wrote “Feel the stirring of the wind as Spirit flowing through our lives,” Her name: Diane Linden. Her song, “Crone’s Lullaby.”

         I would say, “Feel the Spirit in All of life touching me and know I am Spirit as well. Live my Life Song.”              August 9, 2020

Teachers and Wisdom Activators that come to mind this day: Carolyn McDade, Singer-songwriter, who wrote and sang, “Listen, listen to the voices that beg to differ from the rest.” 

         A song, “Long May You Run”, by Neil Young; which I rarely sing; but must have heard, came into my head regarding this subject; tells me the story I am running in my head is I haven’t heard from this aspect of myself since 1962; it’s here now and hoping it has a long run. Enjoying life might be what his song is about or it could be to do with living well to old age; knowing the effect my sister’s death from domestic abuse had on me and how it shaped my writing and my need to do something to end abuse continued to haunt me to this day. That girl from 1962 is needing to be heard.

         “All creatures great and small;” was a line I heard and CREATURES have been my teachers and wisdom activators; such as birds, and now creatures I see in all I look at; whether human, animal or creatures I see in whatever is before me…….

         Trust in myself. 

         Transient is our Life.      We are Spirit.           August 11, 2020

Someone who lives authentically; my daughter, BARBARA ANN SAGH, comes to mind as she 

         Speaks up for herself

         Is happy at home

         Can be by herself

         Not seeking honors for herself

         Lives her inner wisdom                     August 18, 2020

I Want Serenity

         Peace and 

                  Calmness

Be okay

         With Being

Moved emotionally

Around family.                                          

Open Window

Smell of Harvest

As I do Yoga

         Aug 18 -20, 2020

On way to Edmonton

With Barbara and the girls

I Pad is found

Good-byes been said

Construction zone through Saskatoon

A hot air balloon

Tea and muffins

Helicopter practicing landings

Bathroom stop on side road

In the wolf willow

Red and blue birdhouses

Alone the fence line

Water with ducks

Seven oil wells 

Sierra counted to twenty-seven

I saw a grain terminal

Mya a castle

Pens for Kindergarten workbook 

And a 3 and 5-year old occupied

Barbara seeing hawks

I magpies

Relating is her or my tarot card

Dairy Queen hamburger lunch

Gas station bathroom stop

Masks for all 

Peppa Pig on one I Pad

Nursery rhyme songs on another.

Sunday, August 23, 2020 

Mostly good sleep

Down; Sad Tears at 2 am

Out on deck crying

Watching the sky

Staring at stars and clouds

Not knowing why

This morning I know

Unhappy times I’ve had

Feelings I had to deny

To fit in; belong

They’re here right now

Want happiness as well

Body pain here

As well as the fear

I wasn’t able to express

When I was 9 or 2 or 15 or 7

So it is here again

About to be spent

See the happy times

Cause of the girls

Sharing their excitement

Disappointment and fears

Aug 26, 2020

Mya is three

Said

 “Teacher said when I’m three I won’t scribble”

Crying her disappointment to me

“I’m three and I still scribble.”

August 26, 2020

IDEA: Red & Purple Binder; COVID -19 MY WAY  is the Title –  August 27, 2020

Off to Casey’s Grad Barbeque

This Sat. Aug 29th 30-degree day

Swathers in the field

Golden green all around

Hwy 41 construction finished

We now own an RV

Deposit down on the land

An hour from the city

Deep Woods Campground

At Little Wakaw Lake

Now discussing kayaks and a barbeque

Some fields combined

Most rows of golden swaths

Trees not changed color

Cows standing in a slough

One combine only going at 2 pm

Sitting since Thursday’s rain

A field of bales

Wrapped in green plastic

A tour of our lot

Debate where to sit RV

Will we need to trim trees?

For best position of slides

Deluxe beef dip barbeque

Guest list under 30 

Sanitizer and social distancing.

August 29, 2020

Moments are all we have

Explore your dreams knowing each character an aspect of self wanting to be heard 

In a relationship we take turns caring for one another. 

I am learning, changing and gaining freedom from the wounds of the ages as I let them go. 

My body lets them go.                                August 31, 2020

When I think of honouring women’s wisdom:

Kindness, gentleness and acceptance of the aspects of self I now don’t like; knowing I developed them as I needed; to survive and thrive. 

         Seven am I am sitting in the sun in the living room. Last night was the pre-full moon. Maybe why we lay awake many hours. Shedding. 

Tonight; a Full Corn Moon; learned today from web on phone. 

September 1, 2020

Outside in Garage

Sorted my songs

Left at 10 am

Measured RV

New route out of town

Marquis drive to the

Chief Mistawasis Bridge

Through eastern new Saskatoon

Aspen trails, Evergreen

Safeway stop for garbage bags

Lunch packed and hot tea

Saws, a hoe and measuring tape

Owner of land calls

Installed 4 stakes at 111

In a straight line in right location

Can move it forward and backward

Have time to think about

Deck, shed and trees

This general rain in Saskatchewan

An end to combining

Golden wheat, bearded barley

Swathed canola; sitting

Saw Shawaga Road sign first time

Found our lot

Bob pulls nettles 

I pull pig weed

He chops dead wood

I watch cranes in the field

Sun comes out as we 

Eat our picnic lunch

Two young woodpeckers

Storm all around

Absolute beautiful

Where we are.

            September 2, 2020

Heart meditation

Connect with three friends

Grandchildren connect

So many tears over grief I’m in

Acceptance of it 

Surrendering to it I guess

And trying not to be derisive

Beauty outside gorgeous

Appreciating effort I’ve been doing

Putting into life healing

Caring for self and others

Such beauty in my house

Looking around inside and out

Beginning to heal 

Let go of some big things 

Heart and left shoulder area

Development of Equanimity

As healing my mouth now and then

Infected teeth and gums

Teeth all extracted at once

Dentures put in; a horror experience

Wisdom teeth removal within two years

Body Remembering 

Dreaming telling someone

15 or 16 when had them all out

First dentures put in immediately

Patient, kind and accepting

Of the experiences of this moment

         Sept. 2, 2020 

Angels in me; around me

Connected as can be

As I deal with my fears

I brought on through the years

I am now listening in love

I will do whatever it takes

Do is what I’ve always done

And I’m not doing that

Surrender give way

Is what inside me is saying

Accepting what’s hear

Will happen year after year

Only live it a moment at a time

New experiences 

Being at a lake

Living in a bush

Beside an open field

Under a starry night

It’s still the same moon

Still the same sun

Shining down on everyone

Do what I need 

To enjoy being me

Capturing precious seed

Of ONE

Thurs, Sept 3, 2020 4:44 a.m.

I AM STILL HERE

         WAITING FOR YOU

I AM STILL HERE
         Listening TO You

WAITING

         LISTENING

LOVING

         STILL

         September 4, 2020

Lessons I’ve learned I can think of today:

Open my heart to the world. 

Song I may write

How little I changed over the years. Wanting action. Writing. Journaling, Emotional, Spiritual, Thinker, Wise, Physical, Exercise, Taking Classes, Finding New Ways to Take Care of Myself. 

         Yoga, Bike, Counselling, Mix Bread, Bake Buns, Talk with Friends, Music, Being with Women and Men.

Beautiful times with children and grandchildren

Putting my writing out there – then and now.

OK in the Darkness and the Light – Downstairs for Morning Journaling – Open Cabin – Cabin at the Lake Feeling

Open Window – Smell of Harvest as I do Yoga

Wrote 3 books; on the 4th

3” binder of songs and poems 1995-2019

NOW: 1” red binder is full – Purple Cover “Covid-19 – Our Way”

January 6-August 16, 2020; Birthing what can go out to the World.

Placing it all and It All Can.                                 September 4, 2020

Bob gone to Wakaw

I am at home

Counsellor cancelled

Writing out poetry

Typing Sierra’s song

Poems about life

Learnings from Mya

Releasing the old

Relined Teeth checked

And fixed yesterday

Tears I’ve had over 

My body healing

Ideas yesterday

As I sorted own music

This morning guitar out

Song: Where are you going

My little one

Barbara with babes of her own

Sierra started school

Carolyn McDade’s song: Morning

My song: History; to the tune of

Blessed Assurance

Idea: Ask nieces

For correct chords

Big Time Sneezes as

I Finish That Song

         Sept. 4, 2020

Bad night 

Breakthrough Morning

As I Find Songs

Reclaim My Songs

Title some

Open Heart

History

Cost

Pain I

I Want

Home

I AM

I WANT

Searching for Peace

Pain II

Wounded

         Sept 4, 2020

Started Two Files – OPEN & LEAVINGS

CHANGED TITLE on Red & Purple Binder – COVID 19 – OUR WAY

Poetry & Song & – JANUARY 6 – AUGUST 16, 2020

CHALLENGED

Have Been in the Deep and Like Doing a Life Review since Bob’s near death earlier this year, my brother-in-law’s death and the terror experience re Saskatoon gangs in June. Had me in fear and grief and wanting to stay home and look within; finding my answers; finding HOME. I usually spend five to seven am; when closest to essence allowing the emotion.                            September 8, 2020

Living Life Is an Adventure

Showing Up. Doing yoga on my day off of nothing planned. My new ideas or looking back at something I wrote long ago. No idea where it will lead me or go. My imagination and my unexpected emotions of gratitude. All an Adventure.                          September 10, 2020

In the Mist

That Will Be Me Soon

                  On A Kayak

Raw and innocent

Closest to Essence

Communing

         With Others

Rising Up

         In All Directions

                  September 8 -12, 2020

Choices

Listening inside for the seed and creating whatever I need. 

Joyous Celebrations

Plan a Party to Celebrate Getting Through the Tough Times

Attempt new things like swimming lessons for the terrified led me to kayak in Costa Rica; the snorkeling and zip-lining high in the clouds; walking through the clouds top of Peru’s Machu Pichu.                             September 14, 2020

Looking Back

         With Love                                                                                             

Joyous 

         Celebration

Like a frog

         Jumping all over.

Hearts all around

Butterfly Emerging

Still peaking out!

September 13-19, 2020

More Choices

Do My Yoga

Sing

Eat Good Food

Morning Journal

Connect with Those and All I Love

Dress Up for Me

Restrain my amount of Coffee and Alcohol

Read nurturing ideas

Plan fun

Having things to look ahead to

Golf and Tennis or Biking or Walks

Meditate at least Once A Day                      September 20, 2020

Leavings

Find Your Songs to Sing

Mix and Match 

Not only Mine

Tell the Story of Home

It’s Happening

In All I Do

Choosing Love

In All I Do

Being Me

For You

And Others

It’s Time to Shine

Light

Flying Forth

From All

Pores

Purity and Strength

Possibilities

Endless                                                             September 23, 2020

IDEA: Leavings –Could be Idea for Naming the Writings of the Last While inspired by Book: The Woman’s Spell Breaker: A journal for rediscovering your true nature by Cindy Johnston or could be the Title of last poem or the next poem.                            September 23, 2020

Autumn

Equinox

Various Stages of

Undress

The Trees

On my Bike Ride

OK to Let Them Be

No Photo Needed

Hear the Leaves

Fall

As I Sit

On A Bench

Photos

On This Paper

In My Memory                                                   September 23, 2020

Staring off into the distance

Through the deep

Leavings

Various Stages of Undress

Running to get nowhere

         I’m here.

Layers

         Continue unfolding

Light exploding from inside                        September 20 – 26, 2020

I am growing before my eyes. Taking more chances. Feminine seeking to open my left eye. Right eye has been open a long time. Sees the wisdom; a Priestess which I called a Priest when I was growing up. An Egyptian Pharaoh comes to mind; a woman in a position of power.

Part of the Universe not wholly there yet. Emerging from the deep. 

Drawing on the wisdom of ancestral women who plowed the land; lived genteel lives. 

I am ready to take my place sharing the love and truth that are my experience to share. 

OVERCOME backwards is Come Over; get to know my best in all I do. 

September 27, 2020

FALL

Leaving yellow poplars of our backyard

Evergreened courtyard for a country drive

Noise buffer zone being built for newest residential neighborhood

Nearly leaving September behind

Hello to coppery reds and oranges

Leaves nearly gone some places

Migrating geese; golden stubble

Bales in the ditches; canola swaths needing drying

Huge white flock; nine; bigger than geese

Crane type birds- no black tips so not whoopers

Half dozen magpies; a hawk; more Canada geese

Huge eagle sits on the highest tree; two crows watching it

Many darting little brown birds

Another eagle atop a telephone pole

Or are there telephone poles anymore 

Probably a power pole

Four geese pecking the stubble

Seven seagulls; must be near water

We are; a grand slough

Cattle close by

Farms in the distance

Shiny grain bins in a line

Church spire shows off the town

Cell phone tower beside

No elevators around

Another eagle right after I exclaimed

“Oh, the beauty of the land”

Flapping its wings over hills of unbroken land

Poplars, shrubs and grasses; twenty shades of color

Greens, golds, burnished reds; browns, greys

Silver, yellows, oranges, soft beiges

As our picnic in the country ends

More than twenty whooping cranes 

White with black tipped wings 

Complete a fly over 

A raven on a fence post

Great blue heron on water

We follow a line of cars to the city.              

September 27, 2020

Emerging from the deep

         To a position of power.

Writing

         My thumbprint on life!

Centred and calm

         Being for a long time.

Wavering

I’m here

         Engaged in it All!

         September 27 – October 3, 2020

Look

I’m ready

I am living it

Loving life

Each moment precious

Practical

Allowing the past

To continue to appear

As it does

The healing informs

The Present

Healing Myself

Has been a present

To myself and others. 

Taking one more step

Or three more steps a day

Has helped me carry on

When I don’t know the road

Listening inside is how I’ve won

Was a song or poem line from years ago

Another was live my life song. 

I’ll Continue 

Live the Music inside.                                         October 7, 2020

Scared of it all!

Unthawing

         Frozen Parts

Swimming upstream

Unsheathing my mouth

         Laying dormant

         October 4-10, 2020

Monkey

         Going Downhill

                  On a Skateboard

Here

Waiting

Wisdom

With Wings

Clambering 

         For safety

         October 11-17, 2020

Listen

Creatures

Trust

Open 

Heart

Song

Write

Journaling

Emotional

Physical

Allowing emotion

Living

Life

Practically

Allowing

Healing

Carry On

Listening Inside

Live the Music                                                   October 17, 2020

Ancient One

         Listening

                  Or Watching

         October 19, 2020

Beauty inside and out

Winged horse striding so strong

         Will it rescue me 

         A little one scared

         So small and defenceless

Magnificent silent golden buffalo appearing

         With one eye open

The light and the dark keeping all afloat

         In the ocean of life.   October 20, 2020

Snow is here

         I am here

                  Not going south

And the tears pour forth                              October 20, 2020

The light is shining through

Shrouded

         October 21 & 22, 2020

My body

 A repository

Of the Old and the Dying

Ropes of the Past

And a Minefield of Rich

Abiding Beauty and a 

Part of the Deep of

All That Is

         October 23, 2020

Unhappiest dog

Takes centre stage

Amidst covid commotion

         October 24, 2020

Climbing out of the muck

         October 25, 2020

Breaking through the layers

         Softening

                  Finding the humour

The Old                

Put on Hold

                  Is Calling

                           From Inside                            October 29, 2020

COLLAGE:

Sorting out what is leaving. Some Great. Some not so great. I’m 65. Travelled Hawaii. Snow birding for our tenth year. Insurance supposedly settled but was not as health concern for Bob. Mainly feel financially secure but the close calls over the last two years taken its toll; my losing sleep, vitamin d issue, technology, electronics. Knowing and guessing what’s going on. Then Covid hit. Summer Came. Wakaw and an RV newest idea doesn’t seem real yet. 

At the centre, I am a Saskatchewan Writer; A guild in Myself and In Others that support me; People close and Not so close & SWG is here if I want it

Challenge is family first as spending time with grandchildren; all three in different ways; and CHILDREN & partners; connecting with them and family of origin. Winter is coming. What do we want in our Retirement? Active Lifestyle. Not dreading “what’s over the next hill.” Different paths, same destination; LOVE; free to be me, Simple experiences, local, Staying Healthy. 
            Keep Evolving. Stay, Play, Planning our Getaways, Saskatchewan, Paris, The Rhine. 

         Write, Earn, Repeat. Build on What I’ve Done. Put it out there. Confidence.

         Come from Within – What was away is here – Layers

         Art of the Matter.  

         There’s a Whole Universe Within and Without. 

         October 28, 29, 2020 

There’s A Whole Universe

Within and Without

         October 30, 2020

Breaking Up

Coming Clearer

October 31, 2020

LIFE SONG (acrostic)

Living connected
Innocence long gone
Fairly open to new
Erasing history
Sooner rather than later
Onto the next thing
Nothing held back
Growing with Other’s help.

         (a little girl turned carping woman with only her head out of the water in the big dark sea of life – with two golden ancient ones; like a gargoyle or Egyptian pharaoh type creature and a mythical tree spirit looking on that will be there for her if she calls on them and glad I have a knowing I will get through even if challenging to live this; as the tears pour)

                                                                        November 1, 2020

My puppy is back

Young at heart

An old wise dog

Surrounded 

By caring gentle men

A golden elephant

Not forgetting anything

Stepping lightly

Not plodding along

Ancient divine beings

A miniscule child comforted

                                                               November 2, 2020

Up and outside at 4 am in darkness

And the tears come

Looking at Stars & Sky & Moon & Vastness

Know I’m not Alone But

Consciousness is the miniscule me leaving

In (to) the vastness

And yet may have 40 years left.

          November 3, 2020

All of nature is here.

         November 3, 2020

         Country Space Writings

                     November 3, 2020

What to do to deal

With this anger and grief

Knowing each moment as home

“Something which is known to have been from the beginning”

Song from another time comes

2014 picture comes on FB

Me in royal colors

2018 picture comes to me 

Compliments of SWG

Up to me whether or which 

I choose for member profile

More to deal with

Part from writing Beyond 

Whole body of writings 

Have been a way of dealing with 

Loss, anger, pain, remorse

Love, gratitude, thankfulness

And Not being honest if not sharing

The pain and anger and heartache.

Despondency, hopelessness

Not in the despair

Acknowledging I have choices 

Not ready to take responsibility

For learning, making them

Putting stuff out myself with no help

Fear of making a mistake

Hurting someone

See what I’m living every day

         November 4, 2020

Heartbreak and hope

Both eyes open

Alive in the ocean of life

Surrounded by 

A lot of dead wood

         November 4, 2020 

Cleaning up

         Loose ends

         November 5, 2020

Fun loving elf looking 

         Girl Pinocchio

Lie to get my own way

Deep dark abyss 

         Behind

Remember Light

         Surrounds

                  Infiltrates

         Face the Despair

                  I am strong

I can walk through anything

Ms. Pinocchio has a lot of hats

         One eye open and the

         Darkness is rising 

         To the surface

Gold inside

         November 6, 2020

Endless Possibilities

Busy bee mind

 Lying part of me

On the move

Mind at rest

A little bit wiser

Ready to engage

Puppy at the ready                                     November 7, 2020

All moments

Enjoy or don’t do it

Crap – I’m in it

Moving it out

Dead wood

Picture of me

When with family

Heartbreak and hope

Surrounded by a lot

Of Dead Wood

Do what I want

Take my place in 

The Call of the World

Sierra & I playing

The guitar making up songs

         November 8, 2020

Open Book – call it Crap

         Love the Open Writing 

                  Doing right now

         Leavings unsure about

Roarings

         November 8, 2020

With people each week more than own family;

don’t know their last names

Why the frustration?

Not manifesting desires

         Who is reading it anyway?

Sending out in the world

Open, Leavings, Roarings, Gifts

Grief from past, Frustration in present;

         Shame, self-pity, alone

         Others going through similar

         Need out of here

         Can’t stand thought of loss

         Found pens

 Wrote friends

         New Ideas for connecting

         Say good-bye to others

         To dreams unfulfilled

         Old hurts I took personally

         Appreciation for what I have

         Sometimes can’t share

         Fears of not having enough

         Learn to spend money

         Who do I need?

         What are others going through

         What shall I cancel?                          November 8, 2020

I AM RISING

A LITTLE MORE

OUT THERE

EACH DAY

DAY and NIGHT

AN EMBOLDENED

HAT ON TODAY

IN THIS BIG WIDE WORLD

         November 9, 2020

LISTENING

         November 10, 2020

Butterfly spreading its wings

         Idea: Open Leavings Roarings Gifts – made it reality; name on a binder

                  November 11, 2020 – interesting; Remembrance Day

Chalk Full of Grief

         Gold Underneath

Grief is silver

         Miniscule in the vastness of our universe

                  Of all that is

                           November 12, 2020

Internalized racist

Oppressed silent 

Observer recording, speaking out

And ????

         November 13, 2020

BREAKING THRU

         BREAKING UP AND AWAY

One

         And One

                  Connected

One Who Knows

         November 13, 2020

An ameba or manatee

Has come together inside

Surrounded by disconnection

Misunderstandings, separation

My World and me in chaos

Also surrounded by

My World and Me in

LIGHT of Love, Song and Nature

Now the light 

Trickling through

The Vastness of 

All that is.

         November 14 & 15, 2020

A teddy bear elephant ready

         To Unite with the World

                  November 15, 2020

Connecting the dots inside and out

         November 16, 2020

Resting

         Allowing

                  Essence

         In and Through

All Directions

         November 17, 2020

Breath in the Air

         November 18, 2020

Piercing

Sweet

                  Transgressions

         November 20, 2020

Breaking Up

         Scattering

                  To the Wind

                           And All.

         November 22, 2020

Miniscule tempest

         In Big Scene of Life

         November 23, 2020

Spiralling Up 

         And Down

         November 24, 2020

Combining INNER GLEANINGS – weekly instead of daily to save paper and money on ink.

MAY combine LEAVINGS (AUGUST 9-October 17/20) with OPEN 

Tendrils Seeking

         Old Comfort

                  Spirituality

Not there anymore

         Something better out there 

                  And in here

         Even better

                  But I still cry

         November 25, 2020

Spring Forth

         Growing Up

         November 26, 2020

Touching 

         Everywhere

         November 27, 2020

A Little Tipsy 

         But Not from Drink 

         November 28, 2020

Wrapped up Leavings for my Daughter

         Did combine leavings with open

                  Took out names; left some in; never enough; 

                           Enough!

         November 28, 2020

-Appreciating the past; living the present (guy on fb says about his wife who died; lost you 12 years ago; appreciate your company every day and good to see he is happily in relationship now) 

-Learning to BE in the world; even if have to write out what I’m going to say first.

-“All is alive; the wonder of it all”, like a coffee table; alive from the wood and glass; spirit still in it of the one who made it; that or is all projection; debating sharing what I see; would others judge as bonkers or are people open enough; non-judgementally interested if I share I see spirit of a man’s face in doorknob; reminds me of a sheik or Jesus’s face and head I see in pictures; ” Is it projection or spirit of connection.

 November 29, 2020

The Uncovered

Smaller All the Time

November 30, 2020

Still care what people think of me

Can lend an ear

         Turbulence outside of me

                  Always more around

Some will give thumbs up

Majority won’t

Wanting to be liked

December 1, 2020

 Very challenging to be in relationship

         With self, others and our universe. 

                  December 1, 2020

Shine On & Let Others

         Issues Drift on By

         December 2, 2020

Enormity of feelings

         Wonder of light surrounding them

         December 3, 2020

The fourteen ways I was connecting on December 2, 2020

         Email, Zoom Singing, Face book, A drop off at my door, Hello to strangers across the street on our walk; texting, in depth conversation with my partner, Invite on what’s app, messenger; cell phone and land line conversations; mailed letter to my grandchildren, journaled to myself.

December 4, 2020: Bob and I awake at 1:30 a.m.; hear a door close. I spent most of night awake attempting meditation and requesting assistance from those in the light gone before to connect with my essence of all that’s been that we all move through this safely.

WAKE UP: DREAM: CHILD DEAD IN BUSH: 

Feeling better; Wrote in journal: Getting it: Survivor Guilt; I’m alive; She isn’t; meaning Dorothy

         Not my story to tell; I told it re several people’s issues, back in the day of my first book; still do it with my no boundaries

         Stories I hear re societal divisions; vaccine contents; am I repeating wrong information; guilt lives on

Used to want to make world a safer place; now just want to live in the present while appreciating the past. Sometimes I lead; sometimes I follow

Stop: mind

Depth 

         December 4, 2020 

Rigidity

Happiness

         Separation

                  Holiness

Wrong Doing

Unknowingness

         Love when it’s not Love

                  Guilt

Still in the “Please help me mend my broken heart and let me live again.”

Out of step with the world, still stuck in the past; escape with words, books and doing.

Degrees of Separation

         December 5, 2020

An upside-down world

         December 6, 2020

Too much again    So black and white

Upside down, round and round  Seeing eye to eye   

Some would say circle    Some would say square

Some would say    They weren’t even there

Like a hockey rink          Some flying round

Are not upright      Only upside down

Life is a game       Enjoy it while you can

We have teammates        So let’s go and play

Some are in the open       Some closed down

Some love the noise        Others not a sound

Music fits for some         Straight and narrow

Others want to wait         Like a brown sparrow

It may never fit     For most that I know

Do it for myself     Put on a show

Soft at heart          Where it intersects

Breathing softly    Listening till it fits.         December 6, 2020 

THE PITS; the seed

Part of My World

         December 7, 2020

Climbing out

         Hanging On

                  Others Helping

         December 8, 2020

Bit of my Head

         Out of the Muck

         December 9, 2020

Christmas 2020 

What if you’re unsure you like Christmas

What if it all seems a sham

When you hate the consumption

When it’s supposed to be about the Man

It’s a struggle to even write about this

I no longer try to fit in

Now I’m having visions of mincemeat pie

Inviting kids even though there is Covid

          Christmas for me is the big C

          Connecting in any way we can

          I’m not a gift buyer; never was

          Most years gave something to everyone 

I think we’ll still do Christmas Eve

It’ll BE whether we do it or not

Last year, champagne, orange juice; Christmas brunch

Arizona’s rain for days was our lot. 

So, turkey and trimmings for two or five

Christ’s light I’ve seen may or may not appear

Celebrate Christ and all that is

As today I end another fear

Christmas for me is the big C

Christ Connection needed no plan

 Celebration with Creativity

         As all on earth for me is Clan,

          December 10, 2020

As little as the elf on the shelf, of the vast cosmos

One of the herd in life on earth

A wisp of air

         December 10, 2020

Letter to Warren, Barbara & Brett about Consciousness, Communication, Caring, Celebration, Christ, Law of The Land, Blizzard, Covid, others being part, in regards to Christmas as well as sent the Christmas 2020 song

         (growing up could not talk about anything not nice; religion or politics)

Trampling Along

         December 11, 2020

I am a leaf

         On my way out     December 12, 2020

Wide eyed devil stepping 

         Out in a suit

         December 13, 2020

The veil has lifted

         December 14, 2020

BOW – Body of Writings – idea for a video opening -gift unwrapping –                 

Shine on

         As leaves drift

                  Away

Another cloud shall appear

         December 15, 2020

Tried and true works

         December 16, 2020

Glistening

         Ready

         December 17, 2020

Miniscule Me

         Pondering Anew

         December 18, 2020

Wise 

         In My Own Right

In the Background

         December 19, 2020

Rocks Are Big

         I Can Move Ahead

         December 21, 2020

Connected to Benevolence (well meaning and kindly)

         In nature and man-made

         December 23, 2020   

 “NOW YOU CAN GO ON – Carolyn McDade”

Greening

         Mouse ahead of myself

         December 24, 2020

Living the light at the end of the Tunnel

         December 25, 2020

I’m Done

         And so okay with it!

         December 27, 2020

Blog at WordPress.com.

%d bloggers like this: